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Real Spiritual Experiences

My Last Drink, Thanks To God


In 1984 I had reached the bottomless pit of despair. I wes addicted to alcohol for many years, had tried AA, but though it helped, I failed to stay sober. I decided to commit suicide after a long drinking binge. Alone, sick and tired of being sick and tired, I picked up my 45 Colt and muttered something stupid like, "Here I come", but noticed that my bottle of cheap wine still had a swallow or two in it. A typical alcoholic reaction ensued; I picked it up - if I was going to Hell I sure wasn't going to leave any booze behind - that would have been the epitome of alcohol abuse! I drained it, and with my gun in hand, sat it on the floor. At that moment I heard a soft but authoritarian voice say, "Jay Arr, you have had your last drink"!

There was no one in the house but me. Even my dog had left me. Immediately following the voice I experienced an overwhelming physical surge of belief that it was really true, and I have never had a conscious desire for a drink since. I called my wife, from whom I was separated again, and told her I had quit drinking. Even now she can't really believe it. That was on August 4, 1984, and I am still sober. I have occasionally shared this story at AA meetings with mixed responses, mostly positive, and others have eagerly shared their own spiritual awakenings and experiences. Others thought I had nothing more than some kind of auditory hallucination, but I know better.

There is still in the realm of the spiritual so much we don't know. That experience has opened the door to a life I never thought was available; a life of conscious and constant communication with a Higher Power. Thank you God.

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Comments about this spiritual experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, JayArr, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Erin1011 (3 posts)
11 years ago (2011-06-30)
It's amazing to read these stories. I feel like if I would have read this before my spiritual awakening which was only two short weeks ago, I would have thought very differently about alcoholism. I would not have understood and maybe have judged you horribly.
I was in your shoes. Though it was a different story, I was still in them shoes. I feel enlightened just by your story. Thank you 😊
James (10 stories) (151 posts)
11 years ago (2011-06-28)

I hear people say all the time "...if God were real he would stop all the violence in a heart-beat."

You are living proof my wonderful Friend In God, that God allows us to experience life to its' fullest, no matter how high or low we wish to take it. You took yours to the depth of your despair and in your hour of ultimate need he stood there and lifted you out of the gloom and showed you the light that is you in that moment and gave you a hint at the Light that could be you in the next...

I have stood on the precipace and looked into that cavern of despair and it is not a pleasant place to be, I chose to abandon all my family, friends, my life. Then a friend came by and pulled me back, at the time I didn't realize why he had done it, I didn't care anymore, now we are life-long friends. I did not hear a "voice on the wind" that night, only the voice of the Divine speaking through my friend.

JayArr, we all stand on our precipace at some point in our lives, it is then that we finally hear the pleas of the Father In Heaven as he carries us and we see only the one set of footprints...

Thank you for sharing and may the light that Guides you, comforts you, surrounds you and fulfills you, continue to be your source of WHO YOU ARE forever more...


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