Just recently I have had some awakening/enlightenment moments which have included intense body vibrations, interaction with energy, revelations/messages, and, powerful feelings of love and happiness.
I know my story isn't finished yet but I want to write what I know, just to have it out there. I think this is all part of furthering my experience.
Now I'm not sure if it has anything to do with it, but just a week prior to my first experience, I started having anxiety attacks. They were really overwhelming and caused me uncontrollable shakiness whenever an attack happened, strong heart palpitations, moments of intense dread, I felt sick to my stomach but it also seemed to cause me to be on high alert and I had very quick reflexes. I do believe if nothing else, that this saved mine and my children from 2 possible major car crashes on one day in particular. Those 2 possible situations both happened in less that 1 kilometre of each other. My alertness helped me to see what was happening before it happened and my quick reflexes allowed me to manoeuvre our vehicle to avoid both possible impacts. The anxiety only lasted a few days and has not returned since. As I write this it has been 3 months since then.
Ok now on to where it all began. I had been trying to use the law of attraction for a week and was feeling really confident about it, I had been manifesting and was really able to feel the emotion and feeling of receiving and accepting and living with the things I was attracting.
One night it was just me and my 3 year old son home and he was in the other room watching a kids movie. I decided to manifest seeings how I had some time to myself, and when I felt the happiness and joy of recieving my heart went boom! And all of a sudden my body was in full vibration from head to toe, I had to steady myself on the wall because I felt so overwhelmed. Intense love, happiness and beauty was the feeling vibrating around my whole body, I felt so connected, I felt like I was walking and my feet werent touching the ground, I was light and just floating in vibration.
Just as a side note I have had a chakra alignment done before and I had this feeling of not touching the ground, or being higher up than my physical body just after that. And also this intense feeling of love is a feeling I had many years ago when I tried ecstacy for the first time at an outdoor music event. (So I think ecstacy may have some part in connecting to the universes energy stream - I'm yet to try this though)
So for 15 - 30 minutes I just felt this feeling of love, my heart was so full, it was such a beautiful thing. I walked into the room where my son was bouncing on the bed and he was just the most beautiful creature so I gave him a big hug and it was amazing. I felt like there was bright yellow and pink energy all around us, it was wiry and is very hard to describe but everything I saw was made from it.
This feeling slowly subsided and I have never been the same since.
I believe I activated my heart energy and I had done it while sending thoughts out to the universe so I'm positive I connected my heart energy to the energy of the universe.
Since then I have been on a quest to do it again. My spiritual journey. I have been endlessly researching all sorts of things to help me understand this. So much is written about love and energy and how it is what life is all about, so I think this revelation (that the universe is all loving and everything is energy) has happened to many a people since the beginning of time - From the earliest religious beliefs, greek philosphers, buddha, Jesus and his disciples, Davinci, einstein, tesla, Tolle.
I also believe when people "get high on the love of the lord" - then this is the feeling they get. I am not a religious person, I am a Pantheist. I believe that there is a scientific explanation for everything, but I also believe that science is still progressing so somethings that cannot be explained yet, will be in time. I also think prayer and the law of attraction are one in the same. I have many other thoughts on religion vs universe, but that is not part of this story at this time.
Since my heart explosion I have tried more manifesting but haven't been able to concentrate on even wanting anything. I feel content with everything now I think. I also haven't been able to meditate on this for some reason. I just can't do it. So I just keep educating myself and its great I think about something I want to know and then I find the answer whether it be in a book, on a documentary or on the net, the answer reveals itself within 48 hours of me wanting to know.
I have found that I can raise my vibration by doing things that make me happy, listening to certain music, and reading or watching things that are really relevant to this spiritual journey that I'm on. I can feel my heart energy in these moments but they are brief.
A couple of days ago I put on a movie to watch while I was doing the dishes. It was Contact - made in 1997, it stars Jodie Foster, I had no idea what it was about before I pushed play. The first part of the movie shows you the earth then it zooms out to our solar system, then zooms out again to show the galaxy, then out again to show the other galaxies and it really shows how big the universe is. While I watched that my heart started pounding and my vibration started to rise quickly, warmth and energy, I could feel the vibration all through my upper body, and I started having these, well, thoughts I guess, but because of that movie scene I could picture similar scenes in my head also, the thoughts were not like me "having" a thought, but more like the thoughts were being given to me, and rapidly!
It started with the thought of how small we actually are, it was a wonderful, amazing, beautiful yet kind of scary revelation to have, quite daunting. And then my thoughts moved on to how obvious when you finally realise how big the universe is that there are most definitely other planets out there with life on them, and in this thought I realised that other lifeforms are not "aliens" they are more like our neighbours, or extended family. The human race is so egotistical that we think we are something big, the centre of the world, but really we are not even a pin prick in the night sky. We are minuscule, more minuscule than an ant colony out in the yard. How could we even consider ourselves to be alone in the universe when it is as big as it is?
This thought then changed to tell me that all life forms in the universe are made from energy and all come from the source energy so in essence our 'neighbours' are really a part of us, as we are all born from the universe. The difference in appearance of course being that not all life would have the exact same 'coincidences' as we do, such as the distance from the sun to the earth, the size of the sun, the size of the earth, the colour/temperature of the sun, the elements that make up the planet etc, of course with the universe being so large their is a major possibility that there is a solar system with the exact same make up as ours... Honestly the possiblities of life out there is pretty much endless.
Humans are probably not on the very 'intelligent' scale when it comes to living (we do kill each other and our planet afterall) and most of us are so far from being connected to the universe, but other life out there may not be, they may be so in tune that they can astral travel through time and space - I'm sure we could too. That could be the bridge we need to find our neighbours - though I don't think it is necessary at all to be in contact with them, I just think it would be cool and probably helpful.
My thoughts then moved on to relay to me the message that we are the manifestation of the universe. The universe energy wants something, whether it be just to share the love/energy, or to feel something, I'm not sure, but it is attracting life all over the universe, some faring better than others but all striving to achieve the same enlightenment, to connect with the creator, to feel the love, to find our purpose or something bigger than us.
Trying to explain this experience is hard and these words do not begin to describe the scale of these thoughts though, honestly my mind was so much smaller before this all came to me, even the word Universe means something different to me now. It lasted only 5 - 10 minutes, But the vibration was so strong while I was feeling it. It was more of a knowing rather than just a thought, - like I have never really had any considerable care for extraterrestrial life, but now I KNOW they are there. I KNOW the universe can feel or have thought - which is just energy. I KNOW the universe has manifested everything for a reason, but I don't yet understand the reason. I also now know how tiny we are in relation to the size of the whole universe.
While none of the 'alien' part really seems to be relevant for anything, I think I am meant to know it for some reason that I will find out soon.
Since this recent experience I have more heart energy moments, for example today I was driving and a song came on and the sun shone on the water, everything brightened and my vibration increased. Beauty, serenity, peacefulness, love, these things connect our energy to the source.
I just had one of those knowing feelings while writing that.
What if, in order to grow the universe needs our love energy. It appears that its all made up from energy that vibrates at the same level as love, I have felt that, so have others that have left stories on here, so as we awaken we send more love out. This may need to be meditated on.