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A Mother's Sacred Journey From Grief To Healing


Life is a mystery with so much more then our physical eyes can see. I embraced the unknown, surrendered my ego, and started to receive spiritual healing. One cold day back in February of 2006, my life changed forever. My son Stephen 18 years old, left this physical realm and transitioned to the spiritual world. I began my transformation. Little did I know that I would have a spiritual awakening and open up all my senses. I was told that this was a Kundalini awakening that was brought on from the trauma of the loss of my son. Every cell in my body was traumatized. I began picking up so many different frequencies that were in the universe. At times I had dreams of past lives and future events. I would receive messages through telepathy from spiritual guides, angels and loved ones. I know my son continues in another form. This helped me heal and survive the greatest loss, the loss of a child. There have been so many synchronicities, especially with my son's special number 54. I became multi dimensional. All my energy centers opened, and I continue to have mystical experiences. At the present time I know, without a doubt, that I have raised my level of consciousness and connected to Source. I am being guided by my higher self. It's the knowing, and the wisdom that opened me up to all that anyone could ever imagine.

Becoming more spiritual has helped me get through this tragedy. This has nothing to do with religion. I am not here to change anyone's belief system. I only want to share with you how I survived such a devastating loss. Friends tell me that I am strong. I tell them that I am not made of stone. I do have moments of crying, missing him, wanting to hold Stephen and feel his flesh and bones. I know that is not possible, ever again. What sustains me is my faith in God, and I have learned to pray every night before I go to sleep. That truly helps.

A Mother's Sacred Journey From Grief To Healing

From the beginning I needed to know that Stephen continued in another form and in another dimension. I researched and educated myself because I had to know. I did not stop being a mother, even though he was well taken care of and at peace. This did become a challenge for me. I was conditioned to think one way, and now my thinking and beliefs started to change very rapidly.

On Valentines Day in 2008, something happened that was so powerful. Until that day, I used to see energy that appeared very blurry, all around me. Picture a black and white television screen. Now, see it before you get to the channel you want. It has a very "snowy" appearance. That is how energy appeared to me. I looked up from my computer that day of love and knew I had broken through. I saw round, glowing circles of light, some intense and some with bubbles. I remember seeing my son's number 54 in one of the globes of light. I also saw white beams of light with feathered edges going up both sides of my face with rays of white light over my head. I know my thoughts and energy went out to the universe and I started to receive.

Initially, I went through much physical and emotional distress because of this change in my awareness. I found an energy healer and have been seeing her regularly ever since. Working with her has helped me a great deal, especially to integrate all that I have experienced. It is so important to forgive and accept. I remember saying to myself that nothing could hurt me anymore. Losing a child is the worst pain imaginable. I embraced the unknown and received these gifts from a higher existence. I have no more fear and do not care what anyone thinks about my experiences and beliefs. Believe in miracles. We all have the gift of intuition. I know mine existed, but it was dormant.

After this tragedy, that "divine spark within" ignited. I listened to my heart and knew I was receiving this gift through the grace of God. You see, when times are bad and tragedy hits, we have that birthright - to connect to the Creative Force. That connection saved me, and I can continue mine with more wisdom and insight than I ever knew was possible.

It is my hope that you will experience this miracle, too, become more aware, and raise your level of consciousness. I was waking up one morning, when I usually hear messages through telepathy. This time I heard very clearly "Pave the Path with Light." I will continue to follow this path. I hope you will, too.

Many Blessings

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Comments about this spiritual experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Renee Ellen Pisarz, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Timfaraos (131 posts)
9 years ago (2015-01-23)
To 'well wisher', well, I wish, you would stop saying 'allah/god''s like saying I have a pet that is a 'dog/cat'! Two different things. God is father, son and holy spirit, like a three leaf clover. Jesus is God. Allah doesn't include Jesus, for muslims, He is just a minor prophet, LOWER than mohammad! If you want to believe in Jesus, you'll have to drop allah! You're either pregnant, or not, you can't be half pregnant, or half christian. Good luck. God bless! Timfaraos [at]
gysyblue (2 stories) (80 posts)
13 years ago (2011-03-06)
The photo of your son is beautiful. Your love for him can be felt through that photo. Prayers, and thoughts are with you.
CuriouslySeekingSpirit (2 stories) (15 posts)
14 years ago (2010-03-21)
I have noticed that many have their experiences through tragedies and it is unfortunate, but I am sure it is even more of a meaningful blessing when you have this gift of serene truth presented to you at a time like that. I can only imagine how hard that must have been on you though, I have a 3 year old son and I don't know what I would do if something ever happened to him. He is my everything. You have to just try and look on the bright side... I am sure the blessing of this spiritual awakening being presented at such a devastating time was comforting and meaningful. You now have the knowledge that let's you know he is not gone, it was just his time to go back home with god and once again regain his true form and live in true bliss, surrounded by the unimaginable beauty we can't even fathom. It's wonderful to know this truth and know that everyone will eventually see the beauty of this sacred paradise. So it is not a final goodbye... Yall both know now that yall will be together again and this time there will be no suffering or pain. Just unbelievable happiness existing harmoniously with perfection all around as your higher conciousness unites with your son and all other heavenly beings... And that is something you know you can look forward to. I hope this helps and brings you peace from within. Take care now and God bless you and your family.
Well Wisher (guest)
14 years ago (2010-03-21)
May Allah / GOD continue to heal you from within.

It is true... He loves us all but few are willing to put their trust in GOD completely... And he guides whom he wills to the the truth.

He is always with us... You just need to look and ask of him.

Unfortunately, it takes a tragedy in life for people to wakeup to the inevitable truth of his existence.

Most people are too busy to give him the time... But in moments of loss worldly cares stop.

I myself have lost dear ones and it is through patience you will be rewarded... Both in this life and the hereafter.

Do good and good will be done unto you... That is the only truth.

May Allah / GOD continue to bless you with his infinite mercy...Ameen.

P.S. It is possible you had a visitation from Allah's / GOD's angels they are made of pure white light.
...and the peace that descends upon you is from Allah / GOD because you believed in him and have put your trust in him.
CuriouslySeekingSpirit (2 stories) (15 posts)
14 years ago (2010-03-21)
I am so glad that my search has brought me to this website. I have been reading article after article and I just can't seem to stop. Everything I have read has pieced together with what I have experienced myself and it all comes together and makes perfect sense to me now. The message was all around me in the form of small messages that suggest thinking in a new positive way and it is so ironic how so many reject any alternative way of thinking because of the fear that society will cast them out. I feel like a new person. I see the light and it is the most amazing thing I have ever experienced. For once in my life I feel that everything is going exactly as it is supposed to be...Iv'e learned who I am and I have found my own voice. For the first time in my life I feel passionate about life and I am not afraid to open myself to others now... I enjoy spreading this message... Everyone should know that there is a community that really cares and no one should be afraid to follow their heart and find this inner peace for themselves. Thank you all for sharing such inspiring experiences. Through each other we learn about ourselves. I now know that I have a family here. It is truly a breath of fresh air to read such familiar experiences and know that our minds are connected and our hearts are making a difference.
Renee (guest)
14 years ago (2010-03-19)
Thank you. This is the only way, I know I have to tell my story over and over again, for the highest good.
Heavenonearth (3 stories) (9 posts)
14 years ago (2010-03-18)
Your story is wonderful and a true testimate to you as you chose the correct path in a time of overwhelming grief. I pray, those who also live a true loss will follow your example as to not choose the path of blame, regret all of which close our hearts so they can not heal and grow to our true purpose.

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