I am so glad I am not the only one! After battling abuse, IV drug addiction and an absolute Sodom and Gomorrah lifestyle I was sitting in a jail cell, and I realized the magnitude of what I had done. Finally sober after years of drug use, it all came out. Sobs of pure heartbreak and devastation, coming from my soul, erupted... I was broken and had hit my rock bottom so hard, I left a dent in the concrete. All I know is my heart was crying out. For what? I didn't know. I didn't grow up in a church. My idea of God was all brimstone and hellfire. And then it happened... A golden glow. Not that I could physically see, but in my mind. I had a picture of myself sleeping in the palm of a huge hand. I felt like I was floating. Then came the warmth. Head to toe. And absolute calm, peace, serenity. Love... It was like a voice was telling me in my mind that I could never comprehend the kind of love that He has for me. But it wasn't in my mind that I knew this. It was deeper. I don't mean to offend, but it was the best high I'd ever felt in my life. Believe me when I say, I know from experience. It all happened in an instant and I immediately fell asleep. I am not doing this justice trying to describe this in human words. The next day, I woke up not totally sure what had occured. I had my theories. Overall I was baffled. I knew something had changed.
The very next night, I started experiencing chest pain. This is not exactly unexpected, I am a heart patient. From the jail, the medical staff, because of my extensive history, sent me by ambulance to the hospital. The paramedic, named "Gavin" per protocol begin to attempt to put an IV line in my arm. I told him something to the effect of "Good luck, I've torn my veins up with drugs. I'm an extremely hard stick." At that moment, I discerned three things from him: 1.) He was a good man, 2.) He was a Christian, 3.) He was a recovering drug addict. He tried in vain, to get the IV in place. He wasn't successful. Then he said the words, I will never forget, "If you go back out there and get on the point (needle), you're kicking God in the teeth." Right then, I knew what had happened to me. I believe my EMT was a messenger sent to give me confirmation about the incident the prior night. My heart had been changed.
That was three years ago. Here I sit, drug-free. Recovered and delivered.
I need to know, is this common? And any ideas as to, why me? And to all those who have a had similiar experience? Why us?