My hands are shaking and I pray to God that He will reveal to me the words to say. I gave my life to God ten years ago when I was just 18 years old. He has since granted my one hearts desire: a loving husband and two wonderful kids.
This is the story of my baptism and marks the beginning of a new chapter of my life. I have to admit I'm terrified and hope you will keep me in your prayers.
Ever since I was very young, I was told I would be a prophetess by angels and demons alike. I have had at least three "near death experiences" where my family told me I just "stopped breathing"
I see and hear things that most people only dream about and those dreams they call nightmares. I dream of people I've never meet but know I will meet eventually. I used to dream of my husband when we were just kids. Before we ever meet in real life.
But I will begin this story on the day before my baptism, God told me when I was ready to start telling the world of my experiences to get baptized and He would give me a sign.
Therefore if you will, be witnesses to my story as it unfolds, for I fear this is just the beginning of my journeys and hope to find and keep good company as I travel this dark and dangerous road God has asked me to tread.
I sent this email out to 7 people:
September 25, 2010 Saturday 2 am
I feel compiled by God to write this down, and following the examples of the prophets. I bow to His wishes, even though I'd rather be sleeping or painting.
Words do not come naturally to me, often I'm struck mum and not able to voice a single thought, but everyone knows that when God tells you to do something you do it. Perhaps I can incorporate this experience into my Modern Day Christ Skits I'm trying to write and create a drama team to travel to different churches and perform.
It is based on an experience I had this morning that I still do not fully comprehend the meaning to. I believe in signs and messages from God and that they can often take unexpected forms. When I was a child I used to see angels and demons floating around people. I was young and thought everyone was like me and could see them too. After several strange and hostile responses I stop speaking about it to people, because they either didn't believe me or thought I was possessed by demons. However, after in depth studies of the Bible (one of the reasons I majored in Religious Studies at UNC Greensboro) I found similar accounts to my own experiences and realized that it was a gift from God. At eight years old, convinced that I was insane and that hearing voices and seeing things that others could not see was NOT NORMAL and at that age we all just wanted to fit in and be accepted. I asked God to take that gift away from me and only show me the spiritual realm when I absolutely needed to.
People who profess practice in magic frighten me because they open themselves up to the spirit realm, often without the armor and protection of God. The bible speaks about donning that armor and for me it is more than just metaphors. I used to have dreams about demons trying to break past the shields that our guardian angels set around us. I've seen people intentionally trap and hand over to demons their angels in exchange for temporary worldly powers. I used to walk from one world to another where the laws of nature that governed each changed as we passed through the gates. Some were hell realms where the battle of good and evil were fought and evil won. I've also seen worlds most people would say was heaven. I called them sanctuaries where dreams warriors could rest and not worry about being attacked, tempted, or ambushed by demons.
Earth is a battle field and we do not know who will win.
I write all this on the eve of my baptism, because I know that this is a milestone in my life and it opens up another phase. I am only beginning to see what that means. The powers that God took away from me when I was a child are returning and I'm not sure if I'm ready for it. Seeing a world full of demons is a frightening thing and very distracted. Perhaps I could have handled the incident yesterday better if I wasn't distracted by vision of a demon whispering in her ear. Its been a while since I've had this waking visions.
I wrote this poem in High School. I pray that the other things in my dreams don't necessary come true, but I am resigned because I hear God telling me that they will. Its not good knowing future events because you really don't understand them until they are happening. Its all out of context and can be a big distraction which is what Satan want to do, distract us from God's purpose. Well I hope I'm able to get whoever I'm suppose to in this world to sanctuary, I hate it when the demons get them and they die.
They Sit Back and Laugh
How can we control the demons with in?
I look into your eyes
And see the creature that possesses you
The anger that engulfs you
The rage that contorts your face.
Part of me whimpers, but
Out of some dark corner of my mind,
My own demon emerges to meet yours
They sit back and laugh
While words are flung and eyes are blackened.
Sad, how easily Man gives into the voices in the dark.
How can we control the demons within,
When they control us?
Prayer read to the church Sunday Sept 26th 2010
"Lord I am your humble servant and though I do not like public speaking. I feel called to pray on the eve of my baptism. This church has gone through rough times, but that is water under the bridge. Lord I pray now to cast out those demons and all others that may haunt this place of worship, because this is the LORD's House and I do now SPEAK it. For God has told us the power of the spoken word. It can damn or save us, so guard your tongues my brethren and watch your back because if you are not filled with the Holy Spirit your troubles will now multiply for in the Bible it states that if you cast out a demon from a man and he does not accept the Holy Spirit to live in his heart, then he has no protection against the seven demons the one who was cast out will bring to plague him. Therefore, come to the cross and speak with the deacons about obtaining the armour of God."
What the world saw: three days of unexpected rainfall, unseen since 1998 when a hurricane came to visit the area.
News coverage of the flooding:
I saw cherubim storming the skies and demons caught and casted into hell. It was a terrifying and awe inspiring experience. The senior pastor and I prayed that Wed that no one would get hurt by the storm.
Praise God in the Highest, and may His will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.
Has anyone had experience battling demons? For this one still haunts the church, it has been invited back by the Sunday school teacher and her husband the head deacon. Their son is currently in prison for child molestation charges of a teenage girl during Sunday school No one will believe me that she is stalked by a demon and I do not know how to get rid of it.