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I Felt Something In Me And It Was Evil


Now, before I begin this story, I want to make it clear with two things. One: I have not had a difficult life, or at least my life has never been bad to a point where I have wanted to commit suicide. Two: Possession is a complicated thing. For those of you who have seen the movie "Exorcism of Emily Rose", Emily Rose was full-blow possessed.

There is such thing as being aware there is something trying to take over your mind and body, and you not being BIG TIME possessed.

Just a few months back, my day wasn't going as good as planned. I was kind of emotional, but now I realize it was just because I didn't get my way. So, after a difficult day, I laid up in my room and sat, thinking it through, and I found myself getting incredibly sad and crying over it.

Sooner or later, I was laying there, tired, and thinking to myself as I sort of drifted - "Why don't I just die right here?! Just die... Just die... Just die..." and I started to drift off. Then, I started thinking WHATS GOING ON WITH ME! But I kept going... So, my mind took over and I believe, which I actually just thought of, God did for me, to help in the battle, and I startled up and I was scared, because I nearly let go of that rock as I was dangling off the cliff.

What I am trying to say is... That I felt something in me, and it was evil. What else would tell me to die? Over NOTHING!?! I have experienced possession, it is a complicated thing to explain, but if anyone can relate to me, please step forward. It'd make me feel safer. If anyone wants me to explain further, please let me know.

Feel free to email me at free2becookoo [at] hotmail [dot] com or leave a message. I check it daily and I will gladly get back to you.

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Comments about this spiritual experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, music_is_my_soul, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

Christian (guest)
14 years ago (2009-06-22)
To the last person that wrote on this wall, I must tell you that you are dealing very heavily with demon activity trying to control you. But I'll tell you the truth, even if you don't beleave me... You have the final decision as to wether let them control you. Also, you will need God's help to fight back evil, since demons fallen angels and for so they are stronger than humans. But if a human uses God's power against demons, they don't stand a chance. The battle might take a while though. And about those thoughs of you being an evil being, those are not your personal thoughs, but the demons using your mind to confuse you. Can't you see it? Once you are convinced that you are evil, then you won't fight back, and that's what the demons want to take control over you. So if I where you I would go to church right away and share your situation with a pastor and start fighting. I myself am in a fight as well. I understando you perfectly as I've also had similar thoughts. Being evil or good is our own decition, nobody is born evil or good, we turn evil or good.
Escaped the demons without (guest)
14 years ago (2009-04-27)
I googled: there is something evil in me and came up with this site. The reason why I googled this is because I am an evil being and there is great evil within me. It is the birthrite of my family and since I am the eldest girl this generation I got a megga dose of power. However, I choose not to use it, but it is here and others can see it and are envious of it. Many times I am pressed against the wall because I don't want to hurt people but then again perhaps this is my purpose. Maybe I am only fooling myself but I am tired of this torment. I feel as though I can't really live and I won't be allowed to die. There are worse things than death in this world after all and I am in the midst of one form everyday. Evil is real, alive and active each and every day - it needs no one to believe in it for it's power. My question is: If I am destined to be evil then am I fooling myself trying to be good? Am I not honoring my purpose? My heart wants to be good but my soul is just waiting...
M Sweeney (guest)
15 years ago (2008-08-20)
Your story interested me. In christianity there is oppression which means a spirit attaches to your energy field. This is also believed in metaphysical area except they just believe in spirit release. Posesssion is more invasive.
Both activities can easily occure when we are not grounded. Grounding includes:proper eating,thinking,meditate,prayer,exercise...ect.
If you are praying/meditating/living a grounded life you are bring in light into yourself and no darkness can live in or near you.
Desert Mystik (guest)
15 years ago (2008-08-10)
Could be demonic, or Earth Bound spirits. Name of Jesus is pretty potent, Lords Prayer, also LBRP (Lesser Banishing Ritual Of the Pentagram) Appealing to St. Michael is pretty powerful also. All of that together should be a start otherwise talk to a Catholic Exorcist, or some one in Spirit Release Therapy. Some occultists may be able to help as well. Dont assume you are posessed though, things from outside can project thoughts at you as well.

Bliss (guest)
15 years ago (2008-08-05)
Hello. I do agree with Partisan that some people will actually think there are evil spirits where there are not, but I think just the opposite is more frequent. A lot more people than we think are affected by evil entities. If you believe in chanelling, the same process is at work for possession. Now, you may say there are degrees of influence or possession. Just feeling out of yourself, angry or sad for no reason at all is a sign of a dark influence, although there may be other explanations too. But I think that if you were about to kill yourself just for one single bad day, and had never had such thoughts before, you were indeed under the influence of an evil being. The only way to keep out such beings is to have Love in your heart and mind and call upon Guides to help you. The worst thing to attract them are bad feelings, anger and fear. I have experienced unwanted posession too, but in my case it was a spirit of light and so it was a truly blissful experience.
Naema (guest)
15 years ago (2008-06-25)
hey thanks for replying my comment. Me and my friend are looking for solutions but every time we do its not the right one. So I need extreme help. But we found out one thing. Every time we get together for girl's night out we feel like were not ourselves.
music_is_my_soul (1 stories) (2 posts)
15 years ago (2008-06-21)
thank you for commenting and I will email you Naema and I replied, poltergeist45and people will believe what people will.
partisan (1 stories) (11 posts)
15 years ago (2008-06-21)
In God's great creation, God never ceases to Be or Be Aware. I do NOT believe that those who believe in possession are possessed by something other than their beliefs. If I believe I am a car, I will make car noises. It is possibble to believe oneself to be a car. A lady who lived down the hall from us used to hear cars tell her to kill people! At a time like that she obviously 'believed' that cars could talk, think and communicate. Believing does not make it so. Those who believe that, in God's creation, a "devil" exists who can mess with people's lives, minds etc. Are sadly misinformed, and often use the Bible to justify their awful fearing. If I thought I was possessed for wanting to die, and assumed that such thinking was somehow "bad" or unholy, then I must also believe that death does not have a part in the Divine Design of Life. But passing on, or moving on, does indeed have a part to play, and God absolutely understands that humans sometimes, if not often, desire "death", thinking that it would fix things. So, where does some possessing demon or devil fit into this picture? Only by believing that God allows foolish or hostile elements to run free and without constraint, can we be convinced of "possession", and we might then experience a seeming of "possession".
If you want to think possession is real, you may of course. I do not, but fear gives 'credence' to things unreal all the time- when we insist on it. Why should I fear- I am a project of God. I am part of God, now, as always.
Be not afraid.
Naema Rahman (guest)
15 years ago (2008-06-18)
hey jessica got one thing to say to you, I feel that way too so do all my friends! So e-mail me at ema4life20 [at] please! I need help myself I feel like I'm not me and everytime I sing my own song I feel like I'm not singing it right at all.
poltergeist45 (guest)
15 years ago (2008-06-18)
WOW! I can really relate to your story! I am a beleiver in god and against anything satanic. But one day during school lots of bad things were happening and I did feel depressed. Then one day I started to draw upside down pentagrams all over my folders and papers! I don't know why, I knew it was bad but I did it anyway! I even had thoughts about hurting myself and things like that. But a few weeks later I went to church and had god on my mind for a while and then I was better! There is more to my little story but trust me I know how you felt!

music_is_my_soul (1 stories) (2 posts)
15 years ago (2008-06-17)
Every time I read my own story, even though I know what happened, I feel how I felt after I realized what had just happened- Possesion. When I read this I get a feeling that isn't neccesarily bad, but not a great feeling. My stomach does a small flip and I sort of don't feel good.

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