I am not a religious person and had some mind opening experiences as a child like seeing the future before it appeared to happen
This didn't seem out of the ordinary to me, it simply confirmed that there was something more beyond what my eyes showed me.
I had quite a colorful life with many ups and downs and as I went on I began to realize it was my choice to have a good or bad day, to be ill or not. Most importantly in my lessons was my wife's illness which led me to realize that there was only one truly important thing in life
The material began to become less important and there was a lot of questions in my mind as to why things were the way they were - why did we just accept things as they are told to us and on and on
Something else in hindsight was when I had picked up the Bible - read a little and couldn't put the two Gods within its pages together. One a vengeful God and one, the GOD of LOVE.
I decided that should there be a vengeful God I would rather do without him. Should God be Loving, he would find me - A loving Father would find his child after all!
Christmas 2003 and I sat down to watch a film I was really drawn to.
The film "Bruce Almighty"
I watched this with my wife and saw "me" in Bruce.
It made me laugh but there was another voice/thought leading through my mind - hard to explain but it was there. It kept offering its thoughts if that makes sense - like an inner narrative to the film
Anyway we got to the part where Bruce looks upon his Girlfriend "through Gods eyes" and I saw the beauty in that forgiveness - that beautiful Love
I was lifted on that Love to a point where I had been many times before, tears in eyes and lump in throat. Yet this was different.
The experience continued to grow, the Love intensified gently up and up and up. I was being lifted in Love.
At a point beyond words I stood not in body before two lights, not bright but white, they were beings, the same as myself, I knew them and they knew me but no names were required and they spoke but without words in what can only be described as melodies of Love - Thoughts of Love beyond words. No form just Love.
And then they beckoned without moving for me to look, not with eyes but through the vision of Love to there left. I looked and I did I had become them and them myself and then I looked upon a circle of Golden light.
I became ONE in this light and looked upon myself knowing that I was now as I WAS CREATED and had always been and then I became one with the Golden light which is LOVE (God if you like). In this was the remembering of my SELF - OUR SELF THE Christ Mind
Oneness and the many many ideas or descriptions. I used in this experience includes ALL, It is not self but SELF
The Love now becomes AWE AS God speaks and it is like the rushing wind - the winds of perfect LOVE as they fill and flow through your "mind".
There are no words to describe God or our SELF - Infinite, eternal, Love beyond any description - there are no words...
I knew all there was to know, I knew the answer to why are we here what is the purpose and all the other questions I had asked.
Yet there are no words - Its only in the experience of SELF that all can and is known... And all will experience this - none are left behind.
I can't tell you how loved we are - its beyond anything that can be described. I can't tell you how we are cherished and Loved and kept perfectly safe - There are no words to do that justice.
To worship is to look upon the most beautiful loving Father not because he wants worship but just because of his Love for us.
He knows our innocence - every one with no exception.
And then the slow descent back into this dream. What was real is no longer REAL. The former has passed away. There is no sickness, no death and we are the Holy Sons of God
There is nothing to fear because there is only LOVE.
For about a year I struggled to convey my experience - I hadn't the words but my life had changed.
Just about a year after this experience I was given a book by an old friend of my mums. In it I found the following and It is the perfect description of Awakening - In many parts it is written and touches upon the experience but in this one part it is complete.
I had never seen nor read this before my experience.
I hope it is okay to copy this taken from "A Course in Miracles" - One of the many paths home
T-21.I.6. Listen,-perhaps you catch a hint of an ancient state not quite forgotten; dim, perhaps, and yet not altogether unfamiliar, like a song whose name is long forgotten, and the circumstances in which you heard completely unremembered. 2 Not the whole song has stayed with you, but just a little wisp of melody, attached not to a person or a place or anything particular. P446 3 But you remember, from just this little part, how lovely was the song, how wonderful the setting where you heard it, and how you loved those who were there and listened with you.
T-21.I.7. The notes are nothing. 2 Yet you have kept them with you, not for themselves, but as a soft reminder of what would make you weep if you remembered how dear it was to you. 3 You could remember, yet you are afraid, believing you would lose the world you learned since then. 4 And yet you know that nothing in the world you learned is half so dear as this. 5 Listen, and see if you remember an ancient song you knew so long ago and held more dear than any melody you taught yourself to cherish since.
T-21.I.8. Beyond the body, beyond the sun and stars, past everything you see and yet somehow familiar, is an arc of golden light that stretches as you look into a great and shining circle. 2 And all the circle fills with light before your eyes. 3 The edges of the circle disappear, and what is in it is no longer contained at all. 4 The light expands and covers everything, extending to infinity forever shining and with no break or limit anywhere. 5 Within it everything is joined in perfect continuity. 6 Nor is it possible to imagine that anything could be outside, for there is nowhere that this light is not.
T-21.I.9. This is the vision of the Son of God, whom you know well. 2 Here is the sight of him who knows his Father. 3 Here is the memory of what you are; a part of this, with all of it within, and joined to all as surely as all is joined in you. 4 Accept the vision that can show you this, and not the body. 5 You know the ancient song, and know it well. 6 Nothing will ever be as dear to you as is this ancient hymn of love the Son of God sings to his Father still.
T-21.I.10. And now the blind can see, for that same song they sing in honor of their Creator gives praise to them as well. 2 The blindness that they made will not withstand the memory of this song. 3 And they will look upon the vision of the Son of God, remembering who he is they sing of. 4 What is a miracle but this remembering? 5 And who is there in whom this memory lies not? 6 The light in one awakens it in all. 7 And when you see it in your brother, you are remembering for everyone. P447
I can only assure you of this
We are all LOVED for all eternity