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Real Spiritual Experiences

I Was Ready To Give Up


This happened in 2011 around Christmas. Christmas is never a good time for me anyway, but that year I was feeling particularly down. I wasn't sure what direction I was supposed to be taking with my life (I'm still not). Anyway, this particular day I had reached my breaking point. I had fought with my best friend, because I had expressed to him that I had more than just friendly feelings for him after being his best friend for nearly two years, and he had shot me down. So I was mad at him for shooting me down, and mad at myself for even saying anything. The thing about me is when I get mad, I hold it all in, until it all comes out at once. My little tiff with Edward just happened to be what pushed me over the edge and everything came flooding out at once. All the things I'd messed up and all the promises that were made to me and broken reduced me to a quivering mass of tears. Now, even though I have my faith, I've never been the praying type. I don't even really know if you'd call what I did praying. But I walked outside and practically yelled at the sky (which drew some odd glances from the neighbors) that if I wasn't shown some sign that I was still loved that I was done doing the right thing. Not even ten minutes later, I got online on one of the many social sites. As soon as I logged in, an IM from a stranger popped up. I normaly don't answer those, but for some reason I said hello back. We talked for hours before I asked his real name. When he answered, I couldn't believe my eyes! I had been talking to a love I had lost eight years before, when I was placed in foster care. Say what you will, yes, we were young, but our love was real. Needless to say, I freaked out. He probably thought I was insane when I sent him my phone number and demanded he call me NOW! He and I are now married, with one little one and one on the way.

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