Mom was diagnosed with Cancer in 2002. Just one year after losing my father to a heart attack. They had a loving marriage of 62 years. Mom had just started to come out of her deep depression with the loss of her husband and best friend, the news of cancer was devastating to the entire family.
I was in the process of leaving my husband of 25 years. Having lost my dad, now mom's illness and a marriage going down the tubes was almost more then I could handle.
Mom began to cry as we drove away from the hospital towards home. She said she wanted to die in her own house, with her own dog, and in her own bed. We made the decision I move in with her to care for her and allow her to stay at home where she wanted to be. I told her I would stay with her until she was safely escorted to Heaven.
She tried the Chemo and the Radiation and still nothing was helping. I found it quite amazing her cancer was in the pericardium (fluid around her heart), since her heart was broken when dad died.
The Doctors decided that her blood showed no signs of improving and that treatments were a futile effort. She was basically just waiting on God to call her home.
Mom hated for me to leave her side when I needed a break or time to go shopping. I'd tell her I would be right back. She would say, "What if I die and you aren't here?" I would always reply, "Mom, I will be there to safely escort you to Heaven! I know this is not your time to go yet."
Thanks to Hospice for teaching me the signs to look for, I felt I could make this distinction.
9 months from the time the Doctors gave us the bad news of Mother's cancer, the time had come. I phoned my sister and highly suggested she might want to come soon. My sister came right away.
Mom was sedated on Morphine for her horrible pain throughout her body as the cancer spread. I would talk to her but had no idea if she was able to hear me.
I heard this odd breath from mom and screamed for my sister to come quickly. As Karen sat holding mom's hand on one side of the bed, I was holding her other hand on the other side of the bed. My head was down as I prayed for her and thanked her for all the years she had been there for me. I thanked God for the time he allowed me with her to see her well cared for in her dying months.
As I continued to pray a very "real" picture began to play on my closed eyelids. I was looking at my father! I could see him clear as day. There was no pearly gates or jewels in the wall as I expected Heaven to look! It was a dirt ground and felt like an old country road.
Dad looked to be about 35 years old, although, when he died he was 76. He had this smile on his face that stretched from ear to ear. He looked so happy and content.
In one arm Dad held a huge bouquet of white Mums. In his other arm he was holding a baby boy. The child looked to be about a year or year and a half old. I instantly knew this was my brother! This was the child my parents lost at birth 8 years before I was born.
Behind my dad was a white picket fence. Behind the fence was a large group of people. I couldn't hear any voices actually, but I could see them all waving as if to say, "Come on! Come On!" I recognized some of the people in the crowd. Some were family members that had passed away years earlier and some were members of our church who had died. They were all happy to see my mom. They were beckoning her to come to them.
That's when I realized I was actually seeing what my mom was seeing. I was looking through her eyes! I sensed just then that mom too was about 35 years old. I felt her hesitation to continue towards them. "Go to Daddy, Mom, go to Daddy. He's waiting for you."
Although I didn't say it out loud... It was more of a telepathic communication. I knew she heard me. There was a sense of non verbal communication and understanding. I knew she knew I was there too. I was safely... ESCORTING MOM TO HEAVEN!
Just then mom took her last breath and she was gone. The vision God allowed me to witness of mom's crossing over left me with her last breath. Just at that moment I heard a male voice speak to me, (Yes, I know, that I know, that I know, THAT was the voice of the Lord) "I will stay with you until you are safely escorted to Heaven."
I believe with every fiber of my being that God allowed me to keep my promise to my mother. I never knew when I made the promise it would be so very honored as it was.
I thank the Lord all the time for that wonderful gift of allowing me to see just a glimpse of where mom was going and not letting go of her hand until I put it back in my Father's hand.
Nancy J. Lowrie
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